Saturday, February 14, 2009

Stella Awards

A cousin to the "Darwin Awards". Unfortunately these people are still walking around today...
>> **It's time once again to review the winners of the Annual "Stella
>> Awards"**
>>
>> The Stella's are named after 81 year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled
>> coffee on herself and successfully sued McDonald's (in NM). That case
>> inspired the Stella awards for the most frivolous, ridiculous,
>> successful lawsuits in the United States.
>>
>> Here are this year's winners:
>>
>> 5th Place (tie):
>>
>> Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $80,000 by a jury of
>> her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was
>> running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were
>> understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving
>> little toddler was Ms. Robertson's son.
>>
>> 5th Place (tie):
>>
>> 19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical
>> expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Mr.
>> Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the
>> car when he was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps.
>>
>> 5th Place (tie):
>>
>> Terrence Dickson Bristol, Pennsylvania was leaving a house he had
>> just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get
>> the garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was
>> malfunctioning. He couldn't re-enter the house because the door
>> connecting the house and garage
>> locked when he pulled it shut. The family was on vacation, and Mr.
>> Dickson found himself locked in the garage for eight days. He
>> subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found, and a large bag of dry dog
>> food. He sued the homeowner's insurance claiming the situation caused
>> him undue mental anguish. The jury
>> agreed to the tune of $500,000.
>>
>> 4th Place:
>>
>> Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,500 and
>> medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door
>> neighbor's beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced
>> yard. The award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog
>> might have been just a little provoked at the time by Mr. Williams
>> who had climbed over the fence into the yard and was shooting it
>> repeatedly with a pellet gun.
>>
>> 3rd Place:
>>
>> A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of
>> Lancaster, Pennsylvania, $113,500 after she slipped on a soft drink
>> and broke her coccyx (tailbone). The beverage was on the floor
>> because Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier
>> during an argument.
>>
>> 2nd Place:
>>
>> Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, successfully sued the owner of a
>> night club in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom
>> window to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. This
>> occurred while Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the window in
>> the ladies room to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was
>> awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.
>>
>> 1st Place. This year's run away winner was:
>>
>> Mrs. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma.
>>
>> Mrs. Grazinski purchased a brand new 32-foot Winnebago motor home. On
>> her first trip home, (from an OU football game), having driven onto
>> the freeway, she set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the
>> drivers seat to go into the back & make herself a sandwich. Not
>> surprisingly, the RV left the
>> freeway, crashed and overturned.
>>
>> Mrs. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not advising her in the owner's
>> manual that she couldn't actually do this. The jury awarded her
>> $1,750,000 plus a new motor home. The company actually changed their
>> manuals on the basis of this suit, just in case there were any other
>> complete morons around.

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